A Letter to You:
Thanx for letting me read your blog. i always consider it as quite an honor when someone tells me to go visit their blog coz i think blogs are personal stuffs. an invitation to view a blog is like an invitation to view a person's heart...yupyup... so here are some thoughts i feel like sharing with you.
zhu jian and sui he are both very important virtues in a person. but as with most cases in life, going too extreme is never a good thing. too much of a former and you risk becoming gu zhi... too much of the later and you become sui bian... in my opinion, it is all a matter of intensity. do you noe that just a couple of days ago, a friend of mine finally told me that the ONE THING he cannot stand about me, is that i always tell people what to do. and i agree with him. coz i tend to have an opinion of my own very easily. and i never hesitate to tell people what i feel. how ppl react to it is entirely up to them. some people would think i am an asshole tat always tell people wat to do, while others think i have zhu jian... i really entered Tzu Ching so tat i can socialise more. so initially, you see i always very sui bian and not very serious... so y the change tat nite? well... coz my mouth is just way too big. seriously... wat i did tat nite could easily have gone wrong. who am i to make such statements about how a club is to be run when i have onli joined for less than a mth? no... dun say tat i chose the rite audience to say my words... i didn't i felt like it and i said it. that is how i work. do you think i have zhu jian or am i just ru mang i always feel that i am not really a man with true determination. the fact tat till this day, i still sleepover is the best testimony of how much "determination" i have. it really shows that i dun have much control over myself. words are really cheap you noe. you see those inspirational speakers, those inspirational writers... how many can really do what they preach? yeah... they have great things to tell you about how you should manage and run your life... but if they themselves can't even do it, who the hell are they to tell you wat to do? so i try to refrain from doing wat i did tat nite. giving ppl a "lecture". coz i noe i won't be able to do those things half the time. and if i am in the midst of it all, i would fare no better than anyone out there. yeah... i can be all logical and clear headed now... but it is totally another story when things really go down. so dun get all impressed and worked up just coz someone gave a brilliant talk. words are cheap. remember tat.
so, do you have zhu jian? i think you do. Zhu Jian does not necessary have to be displayed when you stand up and quarrel with ppl till your face turn red and your neck gets thick. Zhu jian can always be said as a person's jian ci. yup... tat's rite!! the kind of determination/insistance you showed when you made those beautiful cards for bidding. the kind of insistance when you took your own initiative to made those amazing dollar bills are things that impressed me and show me a part of you that you probably never realise. people tend to be aware of big and grand things. but frankly speaking, it is always the minor details that matter the most. a person tat do not have the ability to tend to minor details when needed, cannot be said to be truly successful in my opinion. but then again, how much detail to put concern with so that it does not compromise the overall grand scheme, is totally another valuable lesson we need to learn in life.
Confucius speaks of the "middle way". Buddha is enlightened when he heard a musician telling his disciple that "if you pull the string too hard, it will snap; too loose, and no music will come out". Thus, the trick to dealing with situations depends on how you manage and strike a balance between being both firm and relax. you may have a point, i am pretty sure you do. most ppl are just not used to speaking out their mind. the fact that you have a blog, and that you have so many things to comment about, simply shows that you are a person with your own way of thinking, your own method of looking at things and thus, you are definitely not a fei shi zi.
empty vessels make the most noise. so when someone is always able to make an opinion and make statements about things. it dun necessary means that he really noes stuffs. i am pretty sure that you just need to slowly let your voice come out onli. be more confident about yourself. we may all feel alittle shy about our ability, but being confident about your ability is not asking you to be bragging and showing off either. so dun feel bad. you have definitely showed us enough to make us, or at least me, believe that you are someone with brilliant ideas and thinkings. please dun hesitate to speak your mind next time at the meeting ok? i noe it is hard. especially when you feel that people around you are doing a much better job speaking their mind and are able to put their ideas across more persuasively. but hey... everyone has to start somewhere. i am not what i am since the day i was born. i was so blessed to have gotten into a good school that gave me the opportunity to polish my skills in this area. i hope you can also yi ming jin ren!!!
like i said, people are who they are today coz of things. well, we all tend to admire and stare in awe at someone else's ability. but in my opinion, behind every success that captures you attention, is a story tat would totally blow your mind away. the leadership opportunity i had in sch last time had its own tears n sorrow. do you noe that while doing all these i never had the support of my parents and how much of an emotional drain it was on me not to receive support from the 2 ppl i love the most in this world? do you noe how much hardwork i put in which thankfully enabled me to took back even more than i put in? do you noe how my grades suffered and the devastating year i had after that which almost drove me crazy and i had to go for depression therapy?? we all stare at the glamor, but how many actually saw what went on behind those? so dun admire, dun stare in awe. if you really want, let other ppl's success be your inspiration to work towards things. and let ppl's mishap and loss be a reminder and let you treasure what you have with you now more dearly.
as usual... these are really messy ramblings. it probably won't even make too much sense to me when i come back to read it again after a week. muahahah... but hmm... just felt like writing anywae... blogging has always been a good way for me to escape work and make me feel good when i tok some seemingly DEEP (more actually just crap...) things. MUAHAHA...
p.s. fellow Bayley exco folks probably won't be stranger to this kind of things i just wrote... yeah... these are the legendary letters i wrote to my junior comm members... so now you guys now that they are actually just bunch of bullcrap that sounds like something... but are really really are nth at all... MUAHAHAHA...
posted by David at 2/07/2004 12:10:00 AM